By Mike Frick

In previous posts, we’ve described our approach to creating a strategic plan, writing a budget and managing volunteers – the three core skill areas covered by our nonprofit coaching programs in China. We believe that facilitating meetings is another essential skill for nonprofit groups, and that effective meeting facilitation requires solving conflicts in a fair, transparent and non-threatening manner.

Many of our partners in China describe their frustration attending meetings that too frequently devolve into off topic conversations, meandering discussions or sometimes even personal attacks. Given all of the time we spend in meetings, we’ve developed an approach that facilitators can use to keep meetings on track and defuse conflicts. We’ve divided these techniques into low, medium and high level “interventions” that start small and progressively build to more direct action depending on the seriousness of the situation. Starting with smaller, less-threatening interventions helps to build a sense of trust and safety for all involved; higher level interventions should only be used when other approaches have proved ineffective at solving the problem.

Regardless of the scenario, ground rules are the foundation of low-to-high level interventions. We recommend that groups establish ground rules at the beginning of meetings and agree on sanctions for members who repeatedly violate these rules.
The scenario below illustrates this low-to-high level interventions approach applied to a situation in which fighting between two members disrupts a meeting.

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Scenario 1: someone in a meeting begins to verbally attack another member.

Low-level: The facilitator should intervene by reminding the offending party of the ground rules. Facilitators might say, “I want to remind everyone that our ground rules require that we mutually respect one another and avoid personal attacks. Let’s focus on making concrete suggestions to the whole group instead of singling people out.”

Mid-level: If an individual continues to personally attack other members of the group, the facilitator should address this person directly: “This is not your first time attacking someone else in this room. Our ground rules make it clear that we need to uphold mutual respect. Is there something constructive that you would like to contribute?”  

High-level: If the attacks continue, the facilitator should call for a time out and stop the meeting. During the break, the facilitator should meet separately with each involved party. Point out that it is inappropriate to bring personal feelings into a meeting and emphasize the common purpose and objective of the meeting. Make it clear that if the offending individual wants to leave the meeting, that’s his/her choice, but he/she cannot continue to personally attack other members of the group.

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One of our partners in China recently shared an experience in which he faced this kind of conflict. While attending a meeting with other nonprofit directors, he noticed that two women had begun to fight. Their remarks were quickly escalating into heated personal attacks. After using lower level interventions, he called for a ten minute break. During the break, he took each woman aside and listened to her side of the story before working with each party to develop steps for moving forward. In doing so, he emphasized their shared background as nonprofit directors working toward the right to health as a reason for respecting one another and avoiding conflict in the future.

Low-to-high level interventions can solve more than heated personal arguments. Facilitators can adopt a similar approach to handle off-topic discussions, side bar conversations, people returning late from breaks and cell phones interrupting meetings. The approach can also be adapted to respond to people who dominate conversation or to encourage quieter members of the group to participate. Here’s an example of low-to-high interventions applied to a less heated scenario.

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Scenario 2: One person in the meeting is talking at length and monopolizing conversation, unaware that other people have stopped listening.

Low-level: The facilitator might begin by saying “I’m sorry to interrupt you, but I’m not clear how your comments are related to the topic under discussion. Can you speak more directly to the item on our agenda?”

 
Mid-level: If the individual continues to talk at length, the facilitator should step in a second time: “I’m sorry to interrupt again, but I’m a little anxious about the time. Looking ahead, there are still several items on our agenda that we need to discuss. Can you summarize your main point in one or two sentences?”

High-level: If an individual has a habit of talking at length and getting people sidetracked, the facilitator might pull him/her aside during a break in the meeting to speak privately. Start by thanking the individual for his/her valuable contributions to the discussion, but point out that his/her behavior is making it difficult to discuss all of the agenda items while still giving equal time to all members of the group. Encourage the individual to be more conscious of the time and give other members of the group opportunities to speak.
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